Why Social doesn’t happen on Social Media

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Social Media is everywhere today. There are not many people who aren’t active on Social Media regularly. I would even say Social Media has turned into an addiction for many.

All you need to do is step into a bus, coffee shop or anywhere else for that matter, and you will see most people stuck on their phones or pads tapping away. Even on parties they’ve been invited to, doesn’t stop them to spend more time on their phones than talking to others.

It seems that life doesn’t exist without recording every moment. However, what you can read and see isn’t the whole story. Most people don’t talk about their problems and real thoughts on Social Media channels.

They pretend to have a great time while in reality, they’re very depressed. Social Media channels provide a platform but also distance. You can pretend to be what you want. It’s an escape into a different world, disengaged from reality.

We are constantly checking on Social Media if people respond to us. We throw out a question and desperately waiting for the answer. How many likes do I have? How many friend requests?

To receive an unlike can destroy your whole week. How is this possible? What have I done wrong? We are obsessed with Social Media and don’t even get it.

Being Social means to have an interest in other people, not just in yourself. But for most, Social Media is about themselves. When did you take your last selfie and why? Don’t you have a mirror? And why would you put it on Social Media?

It’s not that Social Media channels are bad, it’s just too much of it that is the problem. Alcohol isn’t bad; just too much of it is a problem. Either of them can turn you into an addict, and we all know or heard the stories about addiction.

Try to tell your friends to switch their phones OFF when meeting you. Just try!

How many of your friends on Social Media channels would you call real friends? How many of those would you trust with your children or talk about your real problems?

Deep, meaningful relationships are not on Social Media channels. Most people lack the skills to create these relationships. They don’t even know where to start.

A lot of this has to do with the expectation to have everything in an instant. And I mean everything, even great friendships, and meaningful relationships. Everything has to happen now, and we don’t give it time to grow and develop.

Most of the younger generation are brought up with the belief that they have the right to have anything they want. They believe it is their right to have great relationships.

Their parents told them that they have the right to have and do anything they want. Do you want to be a millionaire? No problem, we deliver tomorrow! Do you want some friends? No problem, Social Media channels have lots of them!

Any serious interaction between people takes time to develop. That goes for relationships or businesses. That means helping others and being there for them.
To do that you need to learn how to read people, how to interact, how to find common ground.

How do you expect this to happen in an environment where most people pretend to be someone else?

As I said before, Social Media Channels are not a bad thing, but being Social is personal and Social Media channels are everything but Social.

What do you spend more time with: your friends or Social Media?

John Di Stefano

An entrepreneur at heart and founder of the Entrepreneur Academy in Brussels, Belgium, this site is run by John di Stefano, teaching and supporting entrepreneurs to learn the skills every entrepreneur needs to create a better life for themselves and the people around them.

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